Chapter 3: Your Third Decade
Write Your Life Story for Posterity - Ages 20 through 29
By Maureen Santini © Copyright 2017-2025. All Rights Reserved.
This is the third newsletter in the A Journey of a Thousand Miles… series.
Assuming you’ve written about your first and second decades of life, let’s keep going. Your third decade is next.
Note: Those who are writing about each decade as each article is posted will have finished writing their stories in record time! Keep it simple. Just read the prompts and reply from memory.
Your third decade may represent a transition between post-high school activities — such as college, vocational school or military — and being on your own, so to speak, as an adult.
You may have begun or completed college or vocational school. Or enlisted in, or left, military service. Or worked at a variety of jobs, or begun a career. You may have been single or you may have married and had a family.
Decision anxiety is typical during the twenties for many.
“You’re saying goodbye to one identity and starting to create the next,” says psychotherapist Satya Byock. Purpose and goals were once pre-defined. Now everyone defines their goals for themselves.
Basic Information
Begin writing with your 20th birthday. If you were born in 1960, for instance, your third decade began in 1980.
Always capture basic information. But also make a point of writing down “aha” or “sink or swim” moments etched in your brain whether they fit any particular category or not.
The goal is to provide enough detail so that your descendants — including grandchildren and great grandchildren you may not ever meet — can picture you in your environment, can envision the kind of person you were, and can get a clear idea of your lifestyle and way of life.
List the addresses of your residences during this decade along with the names of others in the household and your relationship to them.
Describe your routine during the week and on weekends. Name the top three places you spent the most time at, such as churches, bars and restaurants, sports arenas, jazz clubs, and movie theaters.
Education and Training
If you were in college or vocational school in your twenties, write the name of the institution, your area of study, the addresses of your residences, your extracurricular activities, and highlights of these years. Describe your overall educational experience and why you chose the path you did.
Name those who were most influential at this time, including instructors, mentors, bosses, friends, and relatives. Recount memorable experiences.
Family and Relationships
Whether you were single or married, describe your social life. List significant others, family members, friends, and others you lived with and/or spent most of your time with. Mention favorite activities such as bowling, reading, and card playing.
If you were married, write about your courtship, wedding, and the births of your children, if any, along with your experience of parenthood.
Always document the date and place of major life events, along with highlights of the experiences and your feelings at the time.
Work
Military
If you were in the military during this decade, describe the training you received, the places you were assigned, your duties, rank, and experience.
Explain whether you were drafted or enlisted and whether you envisioned the military as a career and/or learned a skill that helped you get a job.
If you served during war-like conditions, describe your locations, duties, and experiences including whether you faced combat or near combat situtions.
Jobs
Whether you were on a career path or worked at a variety of jobs, list each employer by name and date along with your duties. If relevant, mention skills you picked up along the way and why you ultimately decided on a specific line of work.
Skills, Hobbies, Interests
Detail your main hobbies and interests. Name organizations you were active in, such as sports teams, bands, or book clubs. Describe your major interests such as movies, music, art, sports, travel, or games.
Health and Welfare
Describe the state of your physical, mental, and emotional health. Rate your awareness of and interest in physical fitness.
Mention issues you, or those close to you, faced and how you dealt with them. Explain whether you were called upon to serve as a caretaker in your family.
Current Events
State your level of awareness of local, state, national, and international events, such as elections or wars. Explain your involvement in, or concern about, major events and issues. Mention if you were ever caught up in circumstances beyond your control, such as natural disasters.
Expectations
Many in this age group are saving to purchase a home or car, paying education loans or still pursuing educational degrees, for instance. Describe your feelings about the way your life was unfolding. State whether you had a plan for your future or whether you were taking things day-by-day.
Conclusion
Evaluate the ways in which your focus and lifestyle changed during your twenties. Looking back, assess whether you underwent important changes during this decade in employment, personality, focus, or relationships.
Describe your expectations for the future, if any.
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The Chapter 4 newsletter, covering your thirties, will be published on Thursday.
Please restack and share these posts to encourage others to write their stories. Set aside a night every week to write. Urge family members to join you.
Tell me how it’s going so far! Reply below or email me directly at maureensantini@substack.com. I welcome all comments and suggestions.
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Maureen Santini is a writer, researcher, and former journalist whose goal is to prevent the life stories of millions from ending up in the dustbin of history. Please share this letter with friends and family.